Thursday, June 3, 2010

June Adoption Update

I sent in the paperwork for our new home study today, all 45 pages. Most of those pages were a copy of our previous home study, but it was still a pretty thick packet. I also have to mail a new request for FBI fingerprint clearances. Thankfully, though, we had an extra copy of our fingerprints from last year so all I have to do is sign the request forms and put the whole thing in the mail.

The man from the home study agency said it usually takes 4-6 weeks to complete a home study in our new state. We still have three weeks before our move, but we don't have a new house yet. We haven't even sold our current home, so I'm a little anxious about how they're going to finish a home study if we don't actually have a home! We may end up renting a small apartment while we wait for our house to sell, but I don't know what effect that will have on the home study. There's just so much to worry about.

I'm starting to feel very discouraged about this whole adoption thing. It seems like all of the women I know (or have connected with on who are adopting have gotten matched with a birthmother or have already brought their baby home. All of my friends who were trying to get pregnant are either currently pregnant or have recently given birth. It's just a tough place to be. I feel like there are babies everywhere I look, but none for me.

The truth, though, is that it would be much easier if we were matched after the move and after we've gotten unpacked and settled. I would be overjoyed if we were matched tomorrow, but I also know that my anxiety level would go through the roof. So maybe it's better this way, better to continue to wait until the time is right and life is a little quieter.

Romans 5:1-5

Since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.

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